From The Administrator

PUBLIC MEETING - INCOME TAX We will hold a further public meeting at 19.30 on Monday 17 December in the Cinema, Georgetown when we will describe the progress on the Income Tax Ordinance and provide details of the Allowances and rates of taxation. MUSEUM The Museum has acquired a new Archive of photographs and descriptions of all the various graves and cemeteries on the Island. It is a scholarly work and has been meticulously researched and organised by Father Keith James for which we are grateful. The Archive will make it easier for us to respond to those making enquiries about their ancestors. Geoffrey Fairhurst 10 December 2001 No: 28/01 FISH PERMITS Fish Permits can be obtained at a cost of £10 from the Cash Office, Administrator's Office during normal working hours, i.e. 8.30am to 12.30pm and 1.30pm to 3.30pm Mondays to Fridays. Please note the change in the opening hours for the 24, 27, 28 and 31st December 2001 as advertised in Public Notice No 27/01. Geoffrey Fairhurst ADMINISTRATOR

The Met Office Weather Report

Statistics for the week ending Monday 10TH December 2001

	Max (deg C)		Min (deg C)		Rainfall (mm)
AIRHEAD	29.0		21.6		1.5
TRAVELLERS	27.1		20.0		4.2
RESIDENCY	25.1		16.1		12.5
GEORGETOWN			N/A
ST. HELENA	22.3		15.4		9.0
FALKLANDS	19.9		0.5		1.9
BRIZE NORTON	13.8		1.7		15.1

ASCENSION SEA SWELL FORECAST:
O.5 - 1.0 Metres generally from the Southwest to South but on Thursday becoming Northwesterly for a time but of similar height.

Sea temperature around Ascension Island: 25 Celsius

ASCENSION ISLAND: Generally fine by day with some good sunny breaks allowing temperatures to rise to 29 Celsius on Tuesday and Wednesday. However there were some periods of frequent showers on Thursday and Saturday especially at the Airhead and Travellers. The Residency saw most of it's rain during Saturday. A fine end to the week though with almost unbroken sunshine through Sunday.

ST. HELENA:Mean Temperature 17.8 Celsius. 33.8 Hours of Sunshine and Mean Wind speed 12.4 Knots.

UK: A wet and windy start to the week as a deep Atlantic depression (971 mb) and associated Fronts crossed the country.

FALKLANDS: A series of frontal systems crossed the islands during the week. Ground frost reported on Tuesday 4th with Minus 0.2 Celsius and Saturday 8th Minus 1.5 Celsius.

“METCHAT” ************************ “METCHAT” ************************ “METCHAT” ************************ “METCHAT”

The week got off to quite a good start on Monday, with the arrival of the new ops supervisor Stan (another new victim). Rambling Roger gave him the whistle stop tour of the island during the afternoon, but unfortunately for Stan, he was persuaded to come along to the mess bar with Fifer, Cornish and Makem during the evening. Big mistake. Also in attendance that evening, along with the usual suspects, was (B)ernie, the fastest milkman in the west, Steve Wooly, accompanied by the Command Fire staff and Big E, freshly back from his hols. Stan made the same fatal error as most newbies, he sampled the chilli vodka, worse still, and much to everyone's surprise/shock, he asked for a second glass.

Tuesday morning saw Makem and Fifer take a quick spin down to Georgetown to have a look at the small boat that was visiting the island. Both of us commented that we had never seen so many people in one place on the island, especially the Green Turtle, which was heaving. The afternoon saw Makem touring the various sights/sites that the TA det (525) have been working on while they've been here, ostensibly to take some digital photo's for them. Alex (Capt.) was driver and artistic director, with various members of the det playing leading roles. On returning to the office to collect the car, Gary appeared at the door, but refused to come in, claiming that it would impede his quick get away. The reasoning behind this was the news, that for the second time in the day, a US flight had cancelled just before the crew brief, meaning that all the work that had already been done was in vain. Both Gary and Makem expected Cornish to explode, but he was very sanguine (at least while we were there). The evening had Makem under the clippers, adroitly manipulated by Rambling Roger, for the shortest haircut he has ever had. Never again, (at least once he's off this island) will Makem get a haircut by numbers. RR also mentioned that he had had a visitor in his room the previous night, namely Stan, who managed to get confused in the dark of the bathroom and chose the wrong door, so he will henceforth be knows as Sleepwalking Stan. Cornish and Makem wandered down to the bar later in the evening to join 525 et al for a few wets, where we were later joined by Sleepwalking Stan. To say that he has been led astray in the short time he has been on the island is a bit of an understatement. Howie invited him along to the VC at teatime for an early G+T, but no one, and this is the cruel part, actually told him that there is no such thing as having a single G+T in the VC. His very sharp learning curve is getting steeper by the minute.

Wednesday saw Makem at work, while Fifer, Cornish and Gary went off for a game of golf. Fifer was ecstatic when he phoned at lunchtime to say that he had wiped the floor with the golf shark. Makem also managed to pick up a fair bit of friendly abuse off Falling Phil and Howie over his short haircut. The evening saw Tractor Boy, Fifer and Makem join 525 in the mess bar for a few wets, where we were later joined by Scribbly, Lee, Rambling Roger, Sleepwalking Stan and Big E. The one notable exception from the usual crew was Bill, who has returned home for a while. We all wish him a speedy recovery and hope to see him take up his usual seat at the bar again in the New Year.

Thursday morning saw Makem in Georgetown at 8am to take the team photo for 525, it must have looked quite strange as he was armed with four cameras. 525 even managed to show their ingenuity at that early hour. Someone asked if the cannon could be moved off it's plinth, "no" came the answer, but within seconds it was, but only to be used as a prop in the team photo. (See below) (it was also put back in it's rightful place just as quickly).

The evening saw yet another visit to the mess, this time Makem (the sole mettie in attendance) and Rambling Roger, ambling down the road to join most of 525 for a beverage or three. Sleepwalking Stan and Lee joined us later, along with the rest of the 525 guys, who had had a productive evening fishing, bringing back some 48lb of tuna. As usual Makem was last out of the bar, sometime just after midnight.

Friday saw a fairly quiet day, Makem paying a quick visit to the office to collect his post, yes load's more Christmas pressies arrived, including some rather nice munchies and loads of chocolate. (The Ayatollah had been doing some shopping at Harvey Nichols recently). No doubt these will go down rather well amongst the Met staff over the festive period. The evening saw Makem at work, where he was visited briefly by several of the 525 crew.

Saturday saw Makem get a surprise visitor during the afternoon, Alex (525) delivering a slab of Castle as a thank you for the photo's. Shame the weather was a bit on the poor side for their last day on the island. Many thanks for the beer guys (and Louise), it has been a pleasure working and partying with you all. No doubt the bar will be somewhat quieter than it has been over the past fortnight.

Sunday saw Fifer and Tractor boy join the GROGS for their weekly wander. The evening had Makem Fifer and Cornish trundle down to the mess bar for a few quiet beers with the usual suspects.

Below is a novel recipe for a festive cake, just the sort that we metties wouldn't mind having a go at making. (many thanks to (B)ernie for this one.)

FRUIT CAKE RECIPE - Just in time for Christmas preparations!!

Ingredients:
1-cup water, 1-cup sugar, 4 large eggs, 2 cups dried fruit, 1-teaspoon baking soda, 1-teaspoon salt, 1-cup brown sugar, lemon juice, walnuts, 1 litre brandy (not sure if this will be enough though!)

Directions:
Sample the brandy to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Check the brandy again to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1-cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl. Add 1-teaspoon sugar and beat again. Make sure the brandy is still OK. Cry another tup. Turn off mixer. Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the brandy to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the brandy. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. of sugar or something. Whatever you can find. Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window. Check the brandy again. Go to bed. Who likes fruitcake anyway?

The festive season began at the weekend with the first sightings of a gentleman dressed in red dispensing random acts of kindness to the children of Two Boats and Georgetown. On Saturday evening Santa paid a visit to the Saints Club and then made his second appearance of the weekend at Two Boats Club. All the children received presents, games were played and food was consumed. Thanks to all those involved for making it a great weekend for the kids. Right: Santa arrives at the Saints Club Below: Santa at Two Boats Club