Ascension : Hash Trash - Hash No: 1107
Submitted by The Islander (Nathan Prince) 18.05.2006 (Article Archived on 01.06.2006)

A nice, hot afternoon greeted the hashers as they collected at the Klinka Klub. The hares had forgotten to pick up the key, but amazingly, Major just happened to know where one was!

Hash No:  1107

Hares:  Gumby-Two Scoops & Bloodsucker

Hounds:  Mildew (didn’t forget you this week!), Voodoo Doll, Hash Head, Arty Farty, Wild Bill Cock, Wallace, Grommit, Princess Diary, Hanky Spanky, Colonel Spam, Eat My Shorts, Whatever, I’m easy, Badger, Sheeba, Walkie Talkie, Little Crisis, GoGoGadget, Short’n’Sweet, Going Down, Alex, Jackass, Frank, Angie, Buford T, Canoodler, Irish Whiskey, Lisa, Major, Rocks Off, Greased Lightning, Lady Pooh, Max, Rinse’n’Spit, Skippy, Haz Bin, Builder’s Bum

Apres Hashers:  Danny, Ollie, Kim, Jonathan, Simon, Glitter Babe, Dave, Forrest Gump, Pumpy Pants, Might Do, Will Do

A nice, hot afternoon greeted the hashers as they collected at the Klinka Klub.  The hares had forgotten to pick up the key, but amazingly, Major just happened to know where one was!  The warnings consisted of not much more than rocky ground, and a few Mexican thorns.  An easy hash was promised – decided the hares deserved a break after a few of the last hashes!  Then it was on-on up the hill and off to the right.  Bloodsucker attempted to get out of the hash by twisting her ankle right away on the flat bit, but to no avail!

Over the rocks we went, picking our way up the sheep trail, trying to determine new hash from old!  The first circle check was on a bit of beach where a few hashers decided to brave the rocks and see if they could get cooled off by the spray.  Then it was across in front of the dive club, and up to the Triangles.  Down along the rocks, a bit of a climb up the embankment, and off to the road where the next circle check waited. 

Apparently the runners, and Short’n’Sweet, who’d been briefed on the runner’s route, kept going at this point, because when the back of the pack made it to the circle check, they were already off and running along the main road to the tanks!  While the FRB’s took their little detour, the rest picked their way down the old stairs by the runoff, across the beach and up the ramps to the main road.  Then it was across old concrete bits, through a mess of thorn trees and up the embankment, down to the power house road, across the flat bit, and up the other side.

Since the hares had noticed on the way in that one of the circle checks by a thorn tree had been obliterated, and warned the group, it wasn’t long before Major was found waiting by a thorn tree, asking “Is this it?”.  No, it was a bit further on.  So off we went.  The circle check was located, and soon everyone was heading for the little track, and found themselves faced with one last little challenge – a slide down a rocky slope to the Klinka Klub parking area.  The route caused a few to slide onto their butts, but all made it down relatively intact.  Then it was a quick scoot across the parking area, down the steps, and straight into the coolers!!

A few of the younger, and older, hashers cooled off in the tidal pool, while the intrepid barbecuers attempted to start the fire without the aid of lighter fluid.  A cup of brandy does wonders, and soon hamburgs and sausages were cooking nicely on the grill.  The chili burned the tongues of a few of the hashers, while others hardly noticed the heat!!

Next it was time to draw the circle of friendship.  Four sorry souls needed to be named, and first up, it was the ladies turn.  From now on, in the world of hashing, Mel will be known as Rinse’n’Spit, while Janine has been christened Skippy.  As well as the usual cups of cool, refreshing water, Buford T made sure they were well and truly doused with a cooler of sea water!  Next up it was the blokes turn.  While names were being bandied about, it gave Buford T time to recharge the cooler!  Pete will be forever known as Haz Bin, while Doug, the strong, silent type gave us a time trying to come up with a suitable name.  Eventually, he was christened Builder’s Bum, and they too were welcomed into hashdom in true Ascension style, sea water and all!  Welcome to the Hash House Harriers, one and all!

As well, there were a couple of birthdays to be celebrated.  Wild Bill Cock was hitting the big 5 – 0, while GoGoGadget is already somewhere in that decade!  A birthday cake arrived accompanied by the usual off-key rendition of Happy Birthday.  Best wishes to the birthday boys!!

Thanks to the hares for a nice, relaxing stroll in the park.  Thanks to my junior scribe Greased Lightning who did a great job of collecting names – a future Hash scribe in the making! 

Next Week:  NE Bay Rd, partway down (watch for the vehicles!)

Hares:  I’m Easy & Going Down

Please bring a plate!