Ascension : Hash Trash - Hash No: 1098
Submitted by The Islander (Nathan Prince) 30.03.2006 (Article Archived on 13.04.2006)

The hares would like to thank J. Edgar for all his (ahem!) assistance this week – apparently he will go to any lengths to get out of helping them set the hash

Hash No. 1098

Hares:  Fugitive & Yeti

Hounds:  Buford T., Short’n’Sweet, Hanky Spanky, Wallace, 100 Watt, Irish Whiskey, Rat Catcher, Puff Grannie, Little Crisis, The Major, Wild Bill Cock, Easy Rider, Badger, Sheba, Forrest Gump, Bloodsucker, Gumby-Two Scoops, I’m Easy, Hash Banana, GoGoGadget, Going Down, Uncle Fester, Bosses Boy Toy, Tweedle Dum, Tweedle Dummer, Whatever, Woodswrecker, Bakewell Tart, Kate, Kathryn, Claire
               The hares would like to thank J. Edgar for all his (ahem!) assistance this week – apparently he will go to any lengths to get out of helping them set the hash  – supposed sprained ankle, having to return stateside for work……what excuse wouldn’t he use to leave them in the lurch??!!  Therefore they dubbed this hash the J. Edgar Memorial Hash.  
                The late arrivers (sorry – we had to pick up food!) were moved along quickly as the word went around that it was a long hash and we’d better get on the way!  The on-on took us across the road from the NASA sheds and across the open territory to a pretty quick first circle check.  From there it was along the track to Weather Post to another circle check at the bottom of the mountain.  
                Here the FRBs took off with Yeti, thinking they had escaped the steep climb, but it was only a ploy.  Soon, they were with the rest of us, heading up…and up…and up.  All the way up the steep slope of the mountain.  Going Down (not a good name at this point!) and Bloodsucker made the mistake half way up of turning to check on Woodswrecker…better off not to look at the steep slope down!!  Congratulations to all the hashers with a fear of heights, like Little Crisis and a few others…an adventure for sure!!
               Finally, with a tight squeeze through a narrow gully and a last push to the top, we were able to head across relatively flat ground and get our breath back and our heart rates down!  At the next circle check, quite a few hashers decided to go investigate the old water containment area.  But it wasn’t long before the hares decided we had to go, and shouts of on-on hailed them back.  This allowed a few of the slower hashers who had stayed behind to get a bit of a jump on the FRBs.  
                It was down-down at this point, with a few following the hash into oblivion, resulting in a slippery slide through cactus and trees trying to catch up.  Eventually all made it to the track to the collimation tower, and again a long, but not scary, up-up faced us all.  The pack was a little spread out by now, and at the next circle check at the top of the hill, Yeti directed everyone to just keep going.  Seems at this point one of the FRBs must have been getting worried about making the northbound plane!
               What followed was a long, but relatively easy (considering what had gone before) trek along the dirt track to the main road.  Uncle Fester was heard mumbling something about a shortcut, but his companions decided to ignore any and all suggestions and stick to the main route!!  Enough climbing already!!
                Finally, we all emerged at the main road and then it was a short hop back to the sheds.  Luckily, the FRBs had the barbecue going so it wasn’t long before the food was ready.  As usual, the pizza, and other yummy appetizers kept us going.  Soon after, the bar was opened, and the festivities continued.
                Well done Yeti and Fugitive – even without J. Edgar, you put on a great and challenging hash!  
                Morticia sends her best wishes to all the hashers and hopes to return one day to join in a few more!!
Next Week:  Butt Crater
Hares:  Woodswrecker & The Major
Please bring a plate.