Ascension : Hash Trash: Hash No:1521
Submitted by The Islander (Islander Editors) 03.07.2014 (Article Archived on 17.07.2014)
It was a confused crowd that met at Two Boats Field as our illustrious hare had been seen driving in the wrong direction.
Hash Trash: 1521
Hares: Over ‘n’ Done With
Hounds: Soggy Boozer, Boozy Head, Bus Driver, Dead Gross, Idle Trekkie, Night Owl, The Last Turtle Head of Doom, Katie, Secretly Dirty, Little Miss Grubby, Pestis Maximuz, Pestis Minimuz, Pestis Minutiz, Marple, Denning, Flash Cake, Tippex, Sniffy, Dozy ‘alfpenny and Masked Booby Inspector.
It was a confused crowd that met at Two Boats Field as our illustrious hare had been seen driving in the wrong direction. Over ‘n’ Done With quickly turned up as the hash crowd grew though the promised return of Sniffy and Dozy ‘alfpenny before heading to less sunny climes appeared to be an empty one. Eventually Over ‘n’ Done With gave a brief hash brief – 5 circle checks and the usual hazards and the strong possibility that the hash may have been washed away. The crew were not to be fooled, many having suffered Over ‘n’ Done With’s previous hashes.
On-on was called and the rag-taggle crew set off up the mountain road, with the trail quickly disappearing off to the right and through the bushes. Novice hasher Katie soon learnt that a hash is more than just a walk. By the first circle check there had already been many scratches and a bum slide down the hill. But what is this coming from the road? It’s the missing Sniffy and Dozy ‘alfpenny who had taken the wise option of following the voices and not the hash.
On-on again and the usual spectacle of a hash descent was seen down a small, but steep and slippery slope with the hashers taking a wide variety of techniques. The Last Turtle Head of Doom was thinking of money making schemes by photographing all with blackmail monies not to publish in mind.
The trail carried on up and up and up with the older and less fit hashers fearing for their health. The refreshments were nearly always in view but we were heading ever further away from them. There were vague hopes that Over ‘n’ Done With would have organised a bus back down, but the experience hashers knew this was unlikely.
The 5th and last circle check was at the weather station up the mountain and the views were spectacular. There were sighs of relief as now the trail could only go back down. This been Over ‘n’ Done With, it was not straight down the road with shortcuts and fun screes cutting off many of the bends.
Once boots had been emptied and the usual hash refreshments drunk, each slunk off to their own lairs leaving the hardy few to continue on the Boozy patio.
Place: Somewhere near the cinema screen at the VC.
Time: 4.30pm ‘Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.’ Elbert Hubbard.