Ascension : Hash Thrash - Hash No: 1437
Submitted by The Islander (Islander Editors) 22.11.2012 (Article Archived on 06.12.2012)
As the hashers gathered by bicycle and car, Sniffy was rescued from aimlessly wandering down the road after Over-n-Done With refused to allow him in her clean car.
Hares: Bladerunner
Hounds: Boozy Head, Soggy Boozer, Bus Driver, Idle Trekkie, Dead Gross, Over-n-Done With, Hairy Leftovers, Hairy Hal, Bum Ride, Bum Fluff, Dozy ‘alfpenny, Sniffy, Scott and The Last Turtle Head of Doom
As the hashers gathered by bicycle and car, Sniffy was rescued from aimlessly wandering down the road after Over-n-Done With refused to allow him in her clean car. Forming up at the spot listed in last week’s hash trash, there was some confusion as Bladerunner drove past. After some milling about the sound of the mighty vuvuzela was heard, directing your intrepid hashers to a new starting point further down the road.
The brief was the usual Ascension hazards, guava, loose rocks, scree slopes, small prickly pear and the occasional rat, 6 or 7 circle checks. The group set off initially heading down the road, finally coming off the road and the Lower Valley Crater and heading south-east cutting across the low slope then following the sheep tracks up hill. The crowd starting spreading out with the older and less fit hashers falling to the back of the pack. The circle check was at the summit of this hill, is unnamed in any map but tops out at 794 ft., with a spectacular view of the North-East Bay region. Continuing up the ridgeline towards Devils Cauldron, the hikers could look back and see the marked trail they were following was actually the “Portuguese Trail” that used at one time to carry water down towards North East Bay. Dozy ‘alfpenny was the only one in the group who could actually identify it though, she said her da’ had told her stories about having to climb it barefoot, in winter, before school to fetch water. Naturally the sound of the mighty vuvuzela has heard, with some of the better echo effects found on the island.
Having been on Bladerunner hash’s before the group missed the hash and kept heading up the ridgeline until Bladerunner pointed out the trail actually went downhill from there and assured the group “it was all down hill” from there. Not surprisingly (and correctly) no one really believed him. The trail led down into the Upper Valley Crater, an area of mainly pyroclastic deposits that some studies has guessed can be as little as 600,000 years old- a relative baby as far as the world is concerned!
Climbing up and down through several small valleys apparently affected Bladerunner’s mind and the next circle check he actually tried to enforce a push-up rule, which was met with a) blank stares and b) some surprising colourful language from the ladies of the group. He wisely chose to re-think that plan. As the group continued on heading for the antennas seen in the distance, the group spread out again, while some of the ladies took a little too much enjoyment in the various aches and pains suffered by the older, less fit hashers. As the last few staggered into the post hash, they found the coolers and food already attacked by the younger hashers, looking remarkably like a pack of hyenas seen on a nature program. The bicycling group also realized that they still had to ride home and it was all uphill from here. As always Bladerunner had come through with a fun-filled hash, leaving this author to wonder just how does he have so much time to find new places to hash?
The post hash conversation covered its usual variety of subjects, from the mythology of hashing to the local elections. More importantly to our loyal readers a couple of important dates were narrowed down, so mark your calendar now. February 16th is the World Famous Ascension St. Valentines Red Dress Hash and Charity Ball! Plenty of time to order that dress you have had your eye on! March 16th is Ascension’s first ever St. Patricks Day Bicycle Hash.
Next week: 16:30 Bungalow B-31 (last house on left before Two Boats School)
Hares: Bus Driver
Bring a plate of eats
“Bad officials are elected by good people who do not vote” George Jean Nathan 1921
TLTHoD
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