Ascension : Hash Trash - Hash 1432
Submitted by The Islander (Islander Editors) 11.10.2012 (Article Archived on 25.10.2012)

Hashers gathered with anticipation at the Governor’s Lodge on Cross Hill, hopeful that hash would be as easy as promised.

Hash no: 1432

Hares: Over ‘n’ Done With and Daddy Dough Balls

Hounds: Sniffy, Bladerunner, Tom Thumb, Small Balls, Boozy Head, Soggy Boozer, Bus Driver, Dead Gross, Idle Trekkie, Hairy Leftovers, Hairy Hal, Hot Fuzz, Sporticus, ‘Allo Gobby, Beaver Diva, The Last Turtle Head of Doom, Sgt. Slipper, Slip Away, Bum Ride and Bum Fluff

Hashers gathered with anticipation at the Governor’s Lodge on Cross Hill, hopeful that hash would be as easy as promised. All started well with thorn and loose rock the only hazards to be wary of. The number of circle checks was hazy but could have been as many as 11!

On-on was called and hashers duly set off up the hill. After some huffing and puffing, the first circle check was soon found with Dead Gross and Soggy Boozer taking a short cut to gain some extra recovery time. A short break and the on-on continued upwards. Hashers were sure that we were heading for the top and then some route down back to the beer, but alas no. As the road was reached the hashers were directed down the hill to the road down to George Town. Another circle check was found on the other side of the road and after a short rest, the on-on was called again. Dismay from some of the hashers as the trail was taking us away from the direction of the beer. Some loose rock was encountered and as usual, the younger hashers we so engrossed in conversation that they forget the first rule of hashing – follow the hash. They were soon brought back to heel and the trail continued towards George Town and further away from the beer.

More circle checks were found, giving Sporticus the chance to make some hash snowballs and hash confetti. Who knew that hash had so many uses other than being a trail to follow?

Another circle check was reached just before the main road and hashers were now sure that we would be heading back up the hill for beer or that there could be a waiting minibus for an even speedier return. How wrong they were. The trail continued over the road and eventually led down to Dead Man’s Beach. The steps down to the beach were admired at the next circle check and the hares were congratulated on taking the hash down to the beach – a welcome change from the dust that had been encountered on the way there.

Another circle check by the pipe line then hashers took a variety of ways over and under the pipe with Chris considering a nifty limbo and Small Balls taking the longer, but easier, way round at the end. Up the hill and the noisy hashers were pleased that at last the route was going up and back towards the beer. A cheery wave was received from one of the local residents as we passed her house and Fin made his displeasure known with some friendly barking. On-on directly up the hill with the beers now within sniffing distance.

As there was no hash, Sniffy and Bladerunner took their own way back up to the top, engrossed in their own conversation. The Last Turtle Head of Doom brought up the rear as usual.

Back at the Governor’s Lodge and there was food and beer aplenty. The hashers agreed that the way had been easy, as promised, but longer than people expected, however, a good time had been had by all.

Some serious hash business followed as four members of the group needed naming as they have completed at least 3 hashes. Martin was first to suffer with Sergeant Slipper the order of the day due to his profession; Mel was named Slip Away due to her association with Martin and her need to slip away from beers to watch X Factor. Next was Louise – many names were suggested but Bum Ride was eventually chosen due to her unique method of tackling Scree runs. Chris was subsequently named Bum Fluff as there is a hashing tradition of tying couples together with a theme in their names.

Next week: 4.30pm, Comfortless Cove

 Hares: Bum Ride and Bum Fluff

Bring a plate of eats

“Walking away and giving up are not the same thing” Unknown

Soggy Boozer